Say You Love Me

“Opening up your soul to someone, letting them into your spirit, thoughts, fears, future, hopes, dreams… That is being naked.” ~ Rob Bell”

1,248 Hours


Some days it feels like nothing, some days it’s an overwhelming feeling. There’s highs and lows, but the lows are really low. I’m struggling to understand my life and why have the closest people to me walked out of it. Life isn’t fair, I know, but this is beyond my understanding. Then, there’s all of the people who surround me but have no clue how hard things have been. There’s so much I need to talk about but it’s hard to want to get it out when everyone refuses to be vulnerable, and hardly has the time to pay attention. I don’t know how you let go of something you can’t get out easily… let go of all the things you can’t speak about. I keep convincing myself that I’m okay and I’m used to fighting these battles. But lately I’ve been afraid that this feels different, like maybe at this point there’s nothing that can fix this but falling apart and being completely open. Terrifyingly open.

I really don’t have the time to fall apart. There’s too much on my shoulders. When I think about it, I guess it’s my fault in the end. I didn’t have to dig myself into a hole this deep. I just can’t ever see the bad until it hits me in the face. I keep talking to God hoping this begins to make sense sooner than later. One day I’m so strong and determined, and other moments I’m not sure I can feel Him through my pain. Faith is on my mind every hour of every day. I know that I have a purpose. I think of all these people who couldn’t live with their pain and I know I have to make it all right. I just keep praying not to get distracted and that He’ll send me someone who will help me get closer to the person that I’m meant to be. Or maybe I’ll figure it out on my own.. just me and Him. Idk. But I’ll keep studying and keep praying, waiting for a sign. Please, give me a sign.

About Me

– I am an ancient soul, in a modern body, with a futuristic state of mind.


“Learning from experiences is one of the ways in which we decide if experience may frighten us, weaken us or make us self-doubt, but it may also make us stronger. Sankofa teaches there are valuable lessons to be learned from the past.”


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