Say You Love Me

As the days wind up, I can feel the small roots fade away, being swallowed deep into the earth without any mark left to illustrate an existence. Everything untouched and every glass unshattered and brand new. It’s simpler to imagine things this way, with no voids being left to fill and not making a big deal about the absence to come. I say to myself, “Don’t talk about the leaving, don’t talk about the memories, don’t ask questions. Don’t bring up anything, I don’t want to reminisce… don’t care if old friends don’t remember me.” They never knew me. And if they did, it looks like they never loved me. So, I think hard to remember anything I’ve forgotten and make sure I untangle every cord. Carefully and quietly detach every string that’s still holding on. I always try to make it simple, the parts saddest for me. I try to believe it doesn’t bother me, and laugh at their concern or ignore their lack of concern. I think about the future and I imagine that a trail of mystery will be the lasting part of me in this place. Poof. I may read these words and wonder about myself one day, wonder about who I was, long after I’ve become something more. Still me, but unrecognizable to the old, familiar faces. I’ll be more than the mystery girl but still they’ll never get close enough. Don’t remember me. Trust me, I’ll find everything I’m looking for.