Say You Love Me

I miss every funeral now. Grandma don’t even recognize, acknowledge me now. I was 30 thousand feet in the air. On my way to life without a care. But I learned the hard way. Four hours later my grandpa died the same day. I don’t even remember the ending… I wasn’t there and now all my flaws are trending. “She wasn’t here.” “Don’t you know, he died forever ago?” “She wasn’t here… to witness.” She wasn’t here. Is she ever, now?” My grandma always smiles to my face but she cuts with every single word she says. She asked if I knew you had passed away. I replied “I think about it every day.” But I always wonder why she takes that approach. And I always wonder what if she could love more. More than her insecurities… and pain. More than treating love as if it was game… cause I’ve been down so long it looks like up to me. I’m sick of people showing fake love to me. Just love me.